unrealistic dialogue

We hope you've been enjoying the fabulous February 28, 2013 issue of Electric Spec! In the meantime, we've started in on the slush pile for the marvelous May 31, 2013 issue. :) One story reminded me of a writing secret, namely, dialogue should be unrealistic.

What's that? You don't believe me? I challenge you to eavesdrop on any conversing humans. You'll hear something like:
"Hey."
"Hey."
"How's it going, dude?"
"Good. How's it going with you?"
"It's going good. How's it going with you?"
"Good. Did you catch that game?"
"Whoa. Yeah. Did I? Whoa."
"Can you believe it?"
"Crazy, dude."
"Yeah."

Okay, I can't take any more! And that's not even including the "um's", "so's" and "like's" people throw in all over the place. No one wants to read that. I actually read a story from the slush pile that had at least a page of that type of dialogue. Suffice it to say, I didn't make it to page two. (Sorry, dude!)

Keep sending us your stories with unrealistic dialogue. :)